Malapropism

Malapropism- When you use an incorrect word in the place of the correct word that sounds the same.

I was commenting on my friend Jacks blog the other day when he found a bank name that struck him as funny on one of his travels. Though he didn't commit malapropism, the comment I made however did and it gave me the idea for today's post . "Don't worry Jack, sammich was used correctly". 

Unless you are some English speaking professional super hero, you have probably embarrassed yourself by using the wrong word at one time or another. 

Here are my own personal experiences of Malapropism:

I'm at work and tell the boss, "I pacifically told everyone to make sure to add their time at the end if the day". I say this all the time. I guess because the beach is on my mind. "Pacific" has to do with the ocean. The correct word I should use is "specifically". 

At a family picnic (not long ago either). I yell, "That bug has long testicles". Husband whispers in my ear, "its not testicles, its "tentacles". Dooouhh!

For years, I would refer to the bank down the road as Fertilty Bank. My Husband, bless his heart, had to correct me again " Its called "Fidelity Bank". Duuh.

and here's one I'll never forget and may have even mentioned this one before but.....
I while back I was having a conversation with a man about allergies. Serious as everything, I said. "Oh I can not live with out my Viagra......Silence filled the room. Hand hits forehead, "I meant, I cant live without my Allegra"! bahahah. Okay, so this is not really the same sounding words but I'm going with it. 

I always get confused with the two words "affect and effect".
Affect is a verb and effect is a noun.

Need I go on? There Is never a dull moment with me. It's just honest innocence.

OK smarties, your turn, Just go ahead and put it out there. What are some embarrassing use of words that you or someone you know has used wrongly? You will not be judged, This is just for fun.